DEAR MISS MANNERS: My dear friend has a job as a bartender and is working a lot of banquets right now. On the job, he is supposed to wear a tuxedo, even if the event is during the day. Today, he told me that he started work at 9:30 a.m., wearing his tuxedo.
What about the banquet guests: When they see the tuxedos, won’t they worry that they are underdressed? If some people are wearing formal wear, shouldn’t everybody? Do you think that situations like this erode the formal mystique of the tuxedo? Consequently, one such official was asked by a lady guest whether he was the butler. “No,” he snapped. “Are you the chambermaid?”“You’re a cab, sir,” replied the American diplomat, adding, “At least you had the courtesy not to ask me to call you a hansom cab.”
Waiters wear black clothes for the excellent reason that they don’t show stains, an advantage also for those who attend black-tie dinners. Whether this dress code erodes what you call a mystique depends on whether you believe there is much of a mystique left after high school prom-goers and grownup movie stars show off their bizarre interpretations of formality.