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We Tried to Look Up How to Buy Stocks But It's Just Too Much

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In between frantically Googling whether my subtle sore throat this morning is possibly a Coronavirus symptom (please don’t tell my coworkers, who don’t read my blogs anyway, I’m fine thank you) and reeling from Nancy Meyers’s Modern Love column, I realized that the stocks are low because of the damn virus.\n

. But if there’s one thing I know about the stock market you should buy stocks when they’re low. Is this my moment? Would buying stock now make me mega-See, the thing is, I Googled the whole “how to buy stocks” situation and frankly I’m just too lazy.

Michelle Phan was an enthusiast and looked up “how much is bitcoin” last year and it was “$8,000” a coin? No thanks. The Jezebel staff was largely in agreement: ugh, stock, too much work.it’s because I’m lazy. So if you wade into the comments to explain to me how the market works, I will not listen.

 

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