I pay my boyfriend rent and help run his property business. He takes my commissions and won’t discuss marriage. What can I do?

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We're answering your toughest money and love issues. Our latest advice column: I pay rent to my boyfriend and help run his property business. He won’t discuss marriage. What can I do?

My boyfriend of 10 years and I became acquainted because I was his tenant. He is 25 years my senior. I agreed to continue to pay rent because he told me that I would get the house when he died. To be fair, I also was not going to be able to move because the rents in my area began to skyrocket, and as a young single mother I wanted to work part-time so that I could care for my young son.

Since the pandemic, we have had to close our businesses and he has had to go back to work. I started an apparel company in 2019, but the pandemic has affected that business as well, so I have been living off of unemployment benefits. I have a congenital heart condition, and I do not feel comfortable looking for work until I have been vaccinated. I have not paid rent since August 2020.

Six months ago, I became very frustrated and made a few spreadsheets: one documenting the rent I have paid over the last 10 years, one for all of the unpaid labor, and another documenting anything I felt he has paid for me . I sent it to him and explained that I felt he did not value my contributions, and he complained that I had “sent him a bill.

He is committed to you helping him to start his businesses and turning his property into a money-making enterprise, while you live there on below-market rent, and never telling you outright not to dream of a future where you marry and commingle all your financial assets. He has a girlfriend and an employee whom he pays in promises and sweet nothings and commissions, until he decides he wants them for himself. It’s a win-win for him.

Your boyfriend sounds more of a lazy scoundrel than a sophisticated con man. Your growing impatience was, I suspect, confirmation of what you knew all along. Your doubts grew, but the evidence was there very early on for you to see and act upon. He showed you who he was from the very beginning. Ask yourself why you accepted this.

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 /  🏆 3. in CA
 

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Ask pay for ur help ? 🤷🏻‍♀️

Why have you removed $AMC and $GME from your short interest list? 85% yesterday on amc and today didnt make the list

“He is 25 years my senior. I agreed to continue to pay rent because he told me that I would get the house when he died” This starts out wild and just keeps going.

thank you very much for your work

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