This Has To Be Year Local Miniature Golf Course Finally Goes Out Of Business

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WHITEHALL, NY—Claiming that the dilapidated, sun-bleached recreational facility had been on its last legs for years, local residents told reporters Monday that this has to be the summer that the Putt King miniature golf course on Route 22 finally closes its doors.

To the astonishment of local residents, however, the length of chain that hung across the entrance to the Putt King’s cracked parking lot was reportedly removed in early May, signaling that the weathered and overgrown facility had somehow opened for another season.

“I brought my son there for his tenth birthday a few years back, and all the water hazards on the course were completely dry and covered in old, peeling blue paint,” said Ray Klingensmith, 43, who noted that the tunnels on several of the recreational facility’s holes were full of leaves. “In fact, the only place where there was any liquid was in a few of the cups themselves, which had about an inch of dirty standing water that you had to dip your fingers into to get the ball.

While several older residents claimed to have occasionally seen people eating at the Putt King’s burger and ice cream stand long ago, they confirmed that the timeworn one-room structure next to the parking lot had closed at least a decade earlier, having since been replaced by a single vending machine. According to reports, a Pepsi-branded plastic menu board remains attached to the former Snack Shack’s exterior wall, still offering a chili dog for $1.

“The saddest part is that the owners have to know how pathetic and depressing the place looks,” said local woman Tori Babbits, who speculated that the Putt King earns “maybe $235” each summer. “And now they probably can’t even make enough money to make the place nicer or even just prop up the leaning fiberglass statue of a king holding a putter that’s out by the roadside.”“I know it doesn’t cost a lot to operate, but I just wish it would be put out of its misery,” she continued.

At press time, the middle-aged man behind Putt King’s rental booth was still there with a row of putters neatly lined up on the counter in front of him.

 

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What’s next? K mart,Peir 1, Piggley Wiggly ,unemployment compensation?

I wanna work for you onion

Hull Massachusetts has the saddest course in America.

I enjoy going and playing miniature golf - at least once or twice a decade..

Can't believe it's still running tbh

So sad. Maybe if they added in a mud wrestling pit and a water slide they could get more business.

Miniature golf is so fun for people with miniature hands like me

Where is Leslie Knope when you need her?

Dead beat dads will be at a loss every other weekend.

This was fantastic 😂 Well done

This hits too close to home in WNY. Bye mini golf, hello more fat Buffalonians.

Leave Diversey Mini Golf alone

I think I've been to this exact course and it's weirding me out.

There are always enough golf bonsai enthusiasts to keep them afloat

Your logo is a bulb of garlic.

Looks like a Rinky Dink business model

These putt putt golf courses are typically just money laundering locations / fronts. Kind of like all Pier One stores were a couple decades ago.

Don't jinx this shit, we need it

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