‘I Was Forced to Close My Business, and I Don’t Miss It at All’

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'I don’t miss my business at all. I hadn’t had a real day off in years. Now I’ve had three months off and I feel free. But at the same time, I’m totally broke and facing financial doom.'

Photo: Getty Images The Cut is asking readers to share what they’re doing with their money — or the lack of it — in the midst of an unprecedented crisis. This week, a 34-year-old facialist in Brooklyn, who was relieved to close her business but has now maxed out her credit and lost all her income.

I don’t want to say that any of this was a good thing, obviously. But in a fucked-up way, I’ll admit that I’m glad I was forced to close. I don’t miss my business at all. I hadn’t had a real day off in years. Now I’ve had three months off and I feel free. Still, the business was successful, and when you’re doing well, everyone’s like, “Make it bigger!” So I opened a second location at the beginning of 2019. That’s when I started to get really exhausted. And it showed. Our revenue dropped by 20 percent that year, and I think it’s because I was stretched too thin. I was not able to be the boss that I needed to be, and give employees my best training, and create the infrastructure that needed to be there. We had some staff turnover.

Back when things were normal, I paid myself a salary of about $4,000 a month, and then at the end of the month, depending on how the business was doing, I would give myself a “bonus” — usually about $1,000. But I live pretty humbly. About half my salary would go to my rent, and then I’d spend most of the rest on food. I love great restaurants, and I would go out about three nights a week. Drinks and dinner add up — like $100 a night. Occasionally, I’d take a trip to visit friends in L.A.

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i'm not sure this is relevant

Regular workers are making more now than by working. Her workers are happier.

“I do have moments of panic. But it’s also hard to care, to take money seriously when you’ve seen it come and go like I have. To be running a profitable business one minute have less than $1,000 the next, because of a germ — it’s like, What’s the point? It’s out of my control.”

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