Big Brother reboot: you’ll be familiar with this concept from the Dublin rental market

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Patrick Freyne: The smartest thing George Orwell ever did was to turn his book into a reality TV show

a thoughtful housemate named Matty explains the plot of a George Orwell novel to an assortment of housemates who are seemingly ignorant of the provenance of the Big Brother concept.

Tom is one of two Big Brother housemates with a permed mullet, a dystopian outcome never even hinted at by that hack Orwell The first housemate, Jenkin, is a beardy man in a loud shirt. He says: “I love a bitch, I love a bit of a goss ... I can’t help being a bit of an instigator.” These are, of course, the last words spoken by Winston Smith in George Orwell’s 1974.

Matty, my literarily-informed favourite, tells us he is a fan of “ecstatic dancing” and talks about how much he loves “freedom ... to travel, to live, to work, to love, to eat from a bin, to do anything”. It’s hard not to focus on the “eat from a bin” part of this sentence and to conclude that the main freedom Matty is excited about is eating from a bin.

Other things stay consistent. As they enter the house, Big Brother, represented by a disembodied voice, makes them play musical statues and then hide-and-seek like a whimsical deity. Then he announces that he has more tasks for them. “Ah for f**k’s sake,” says Olivia, a Scottish dancer, who must not have seen the show before. She has a way with words .

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