The Portland Realtor Dealing With ‘City Money’ and Only 6 Houses on the Market

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RealtorDiaries: 'Anything on or near the water is just going to fly. People are paying top-top dollar just to get a glimpse of the ocean, even if it’s a shit box.'

Photo-Illustration: Curbed, Photos: Getty In the past year, the real-estate market has, well, gone berserk. Houses are going for millions over asking in Boise and Albuquerque. Buyers are offering to name their firstborn baby after sellers. In this biweekly series, Realtor Diaries, we hear from the people at the center of it all — the 2 a.m. emails from clients, the 16-hour workdays, six days a week, and the all-cash offers coming in from people who’ve never once seen the property they’re buying.

That house has what everyone wants: It is DONE. Like, not a drop of work needed. Open, but not too open. Modern but not too modern. Private, walkable to a small beach. That’s the kind of situation that people will throw down stupid numbers for. 9 a.m. I call a client about an off-market property I’ve scoped out. This client lives in Europe and found me on Instagram — she’s set on moving to a big, Victorian-mansion-type house in Portland, even though she has only visited Maine once. I tell her that I recently met a man at a party and his house is exactly what she wants. He’s very private and doesn’t need to move, nor does he need the money — hence the off-market-ness of it all. I tell her his “make me move price” is $2.5 million.

The money that has been here up till now is old money, generational money; think the Bush family. This guy is typical of a lot of the newcomers. Big-city money — usually New York or San Francisco. Finance or tech. 11:30 p.m One of my girlfriends calls to pick my brain about buying a house in South Portland. Your most ordinary houses are now at least a million dollars, which sucks for locals like my friend. I tell her she’s doing great but that she can’t buy the kind of home she wants in this climate. Will that change? I honestly don’t think so. I tell her to try anyway, if she can swing it.If you have money plus kids, Cape Elizabeth is another good option.

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