12 negative behaviors that highly likable people avoid - Business Insider

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12 negative behaviors that highly likable people avoid (via Inc)

with even occasional repugnant behavior? Time and again over my 30 year career I've seen that likable people who are easy, fun to work with, and are easy to rally around have far more successful careers than curmudgeons. The sticks-in-the-mud might win the occasional promotion or get that better project in the short run, but over the long haul, likable people win out.

I've worked with all kinds of bosses, even some that made the boss from the movie "Office Space" look like boss of the year.Combining that experience with interviews I conducted for "Find the Fire," I can share 12 behaviors you'll never see from highly likable people.Such a big turnoff. It's feigning humility to coyly brag, hoping to reap the benefits of both humbleness and awareness of your accomplishments.

Be more selective about what you share, and save shares for your most important updates and relatable moments. You know the type — all about them, all the time. Constantly talking about, and looking out, for themselves. Self-interest nets lack of interest from others. If you truly embrace that leadership isn't about you, you'll personally benefit more than if you act the opposite. Nothing's more transparent than when someone's not being transparent.

Listen and practice the WAIT principle if necessary . Ask questions. Show interest. But beware this next one.Parties to a conversation should share equally about themselves.I'm guilty here. It's the reverse law of reciprocation. It's great if you're a great listener and ask lots of questions. But at some point, you have to share about yourself too or the connection weakens and the other might even feel manipulated.

People who lose their temper too much or never show any emotion whatsoever are hard to like. We can forgive instances of both, but don't like constancy of either. On the no-emotion side, this includes never smiling. Tim Sanders, author of"

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