SATIRE | A spot of tea, scones and the art of doing business

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The rich and famous meet to discuss damage control and to educate the group's new joiners on how to conduct business.

- Del “Boy” Trotter’s famous last words in the British comedy “Only Fools and Horses”.| The four gleaming Bentleys with personalised number plates were parked in VIP slots in the porch. The celebrity wives who walked into the hotel with the men had already arranged their own programme. While the men met and discussed business opportunities, the ladies were all set for their manicure, pedicure and spa sessions.

The “lesser” carriages like Beemers and Mercs owned by the second echelon were jockey-parked nearby. The rich and famous were gathering for a tete-a-tete over muffins, scones and cultured Irish tea. Who cares if there was insufficient space around the oblong table to practise social distancing? The meeting was crucial in the current circumstances. There had to be damage control. Some wayward ones had been put in difficult situations. It may not have been entirely their fault – directives to cronies and middlemen had not been spelt out clearly and hence went overboard with their over-zealousness.

First things, first, said the silver-haired politician who chaired the meeting. “Don’t touch anything to do with aid or donations meant for the rakyat. Small ticket items - stuff like food hampers are not worth the risk. Don’t pretend you don’t read newspapers or watch TV. That will invite unnecessary attraction...

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