Domestic violence experts: What to do if you're isolated with an abuser - Business Insider

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What to do if you're isolated with an abuser during the pandemic, according to women's shelter and anti-domestic violence advocates

, nine of the 20 large U.S. metropolitan police departments it contacted saw double-digit percentage jumps in domestic violence cases or 911 calls in March, either compared to the previous year or to the beginning of 2020.

Note: Each of our sources was quick to emphasize that it's difficult — and, in some cases, harmful — to give specific recommendations for someone isolated with an abuser, because these toxic relationships are uniquely personal and complicated for every victim. A tactic that works for one person could result in dangerous escalation for another.

When you do reach out to someone, assess your safest options — abusers often monitor their victims' phones, as well as track their GPS, Kappos warns. You may need to delete your texts or call logs and find creative ways to connect. , says that might be going for a walk or drive, going into the backyard, or just going into a different bedroom to make a phone call. Use taking your kids to the park to play as an excuse to get out, then make a call from there, she suggests.

In addition to Glenn's suggestions, Kappos recommends having an emergency contact, a cellphone the abuser doesn't have access to, credit cards on the side, money stashed away, and legal representation if you plan to take your kids when you leave . However, Kappos notes that this may not be doable for many victims, as financial abuse often factors into domestic violence.

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