Best Buy CEO Humbly Asks If Everyone Can Go Out And Buy A Cord Or Something To Help With Company’s Coronavirus Losses

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RICHFIELD, MN—Saying it would be a really huge help during a difficult time, Best Buy CEO Corie Barry sheepishly pleaded with Americans on Thursday to go out and buy a cord or maybe an adapter of some kind to support the electronics retailer as it faces losses related to the coronavirus. “We’re expecting lower sales and profits due to Covid-19, so if you guys could swing by sometime and pick up a cable or possibly a phone charger, that would be awfully great,” said Barry, adding that it wouldn’t have to be anything expensive, like a 25-foot HDMI cable, but could just be an extra coaxial cable, some speaker wire, or even a regular old extension cord for when you need to plug in something that’s too far away from an outlet. “It’s always good to have extra cables and stuff like that around. If you don’t need it right now, you could just put it in a drawer with all your other cords. Something to think about, anyway. And hey, while you’re in our store, maybe you’ll want to pick up something extra like a small portable Bluetooth speaker or a DVD of a movie you like. Might come in handy. Plus, we’d be so, so grateful for that.” Barry went on to state that if you don’t want to purchase any electronics at the moment, Best Buy also sells candy and soft drinks in the checkout line, and everyone deserves to have a little treat now and then.

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I did my part. Just purchased a blue tooth enabled face mask.

i need something to tie up loose ends what do you recommend?

I used to work there and I can't tell you how many ID10T cables I sold to customers...

At this rate, it will go from 'Best Buy' to 'Worst Buy'

Kinda hard when they don't let you in the store....

Yeah I'll get a super gold deluxe hd 900 ft HDMI cable for $6,000

thematthowardd

We just bought a 50” LGTV and a Bose 300! BestBuy CEO

Do those guys have Fleshlights? I’m asking for a friend. 😬

looking at that picture, she has a wide freaking monitor, but still running on windows 7, what a freaking loser am i right gamers

I legit just picked up a new Nintendo Switch cord yesterday. I hope it helped. Hate to think of that poor CEO being put in dire straights.

I know this is an onion article but Best buy is actually a good store to go and actually see electronics side by side. Imma buy a $30 HDMI cord tonight.

Honestly, they never have the right cord even if you bought the laptop there, we're like, 0 for 3. (Amazon isn't great either, 3rd party sellers and it doesn't work half the time.)

I clicked the link because I chuckled.

Maybe they can lay off some of those creepy-ass 'greeters,' whose real job is to follow minorities around asking if we're SURE we don't need help

Buy the new cordless extension cord by wipegos!

The purchase of a single HDMI cord would put them in the black.

Hang in there Best Buy!

Rough but true

Lots of high paid CEO's right now going: Hmmmm had we only freed up shoppers financially instead of hoarding money this might not be a problem.

Their wireless cords are good, I hear..

lol

Since my first borns birth I’ve been cutting the cord not about to stop

use don't go to a store!

You will need several HDMI cords for all the additional binge-watching.

Yeah, and I know exactly where to plug in that cord.

One of those nice gold plated ones too, not the cheap ones.

'Sure, our digital audio cables cost twice as much as they do at Wal-Mart, but hey--that's, uh, TWICE as much money towards a good cause or some shit'

🤣

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