An entrepreneur shares how early success took a toll on his health - Business Insider

Two crossed lines that form an 'X'. It indicates a way to close an interaction, or dismiss a notification.John Roa is an entrepreneur who's run several technology companies including design agency ÄKTA, which was bought by Salesforce in 2015. He's also an author, speaker, and podcast host of "The John Roa Show."In it, he candidly discusses the plight of the young entrepreneur, and shares how early success took a toll on his mental health, ambition, and well-being.

I scheduled a team meeting, which was probably the first time I had ever called one. I wonder how many employees thought I was going to announce we were going out of business. No one else had been included in the plan to move, apart from Kevin. I had made the decision to keep everything at ÄKTA under wraps from the team, whether my strategic plans, the financials, or company problems.I figured there would be a lot of scary moments as we grew, and I felt it was my job to absorb them alone.

I spent an incredible amount of energy manufacturing a version of a leader, of a CEO, that gave the team and marketplace the most confidence in my ability to lead. Part of that was being fearless, especially in the face of adversity and risk. At times, I could mimic that confidence and fearlessness internally and make decisions in my head without a second thought. Other times, the doubt and uncertainty would fester like an infection, but would never permeate out far enough for anyone to see.

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