Advice | Ask Amy: My fiancé feels excluded when I take business trips without him

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Fiancé doesn’t want this letter-writer going on “fun” business trips without him.

Enter “New Guy.” We met last year and hit it off like dynamite. He’s smart, stable, attentive and loves me. He was attracted to me because of my free spirit, confidence, drive and intelligence. I am self-employed, financially very stable and chose my profession so I could incorporate travel into my life. He is inspired by my travels and wants the same for himself — but he is an engineer and gets only two weeks off every year.

I don’t want to blow the best relationship of my life, but I will end up very resentful if I have to give up a big part of who I am for someone else. I never want to do that again.Years ago, just after I got married, my new husband told me that he wanted to run for local office. This would involve many nights campaigning and attending meetings, leaving me quite literally holding the bag in our household.

If he can’t be happy with you being on the road, and you can’t be happy being at home with him, then perhaps you should take marriage off the table for now and continue to enjoy the relationship as it is.Thirty-eight years ago, I conceived our son via sperm donation from a medical student because of my husband’s infertility. This took place in a doctor’s clinic.

 

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