LOS ANGELES—Saying there was no better investment than sheltering the A-list celebrity in a tight crawl space, a panel of top real estate experts agreed Friday that having actor and director George Clooney live in the attic of one’s home was a great way to boost its resale value.
“An analysis of market trends clearly shows that a house is worth much more anytime George Clooney has been squatting in an unfinished upper level of the residence,” said real estate agent Suzanne Erazo, who added that homeowners can expect a 10% year-over-year rate of appreciation even if they simply lodge thestar within the eaves of a dwelling, occasionally allowing him to sneak down and steal scraps of food from the trash at night.
Shit....ok there goes my Scott Baio.
Fine, but honestly... how many people have any space left in their attic?
Onion publishes joke from when they used to be funny. And solvent.
'GlobalMidnightExpress 메시아께서 오시니 제발 준비하고 넘어지지 말고 거룩하고 의로우며 회개하고 하나님께 올바로 서고 하나님을 경외하라고 이 세대에 울부짖고 있습니다. 메시아께서 오십니다.
'GlobalMidnightExpress There are immorality and compromise in the modern church. There has also been a mixture of other religions in the church. Jesus asked the church to endure. The Messiah is coming soon.
. LazyFriday
Yeah, but disposable monthly income really takes a hit!
Would be fun at first, but I see him stealing every date you bring home.
Until he keeps talking about starving kids over breakfast.
That last line tho 🤣
I tell the kids the attic noises are from the Batman protecting the house when it's just meemaw foraging for food.
I put a Nespresso machine up there for him he won’t be out for a while
MrDelicious13 Can confirm
What about Louie Anderson in my basement?
Did he bring his own Nespresso machine?
Yea, but he shits everywhere.
Creeps the hell out of me.
pssssst he's in my attic now.