‘Diana’s There, On Netflix!’ Shout British Paparazzi Reflexively Ramming Car Into TV

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LONDON—Cameras flashing as they barreled toward the screen upon which they believed they had spotted the Princess of Wales, several British paparazzi were overheard shouting, “Diana’s there, on Netflix!” Tuesday before reflexively ramming a car into a television. “Princess Di! Princess Di! Over here!” said paparazzo Edmond Dowell, gunning it through a central London living room at 90 mph and demolishing the flat-screen display as he joined the dozens of photographers attempting to get a good shot of the late princess. “Over here, Lady Di! Is Dodi with you or is he back at home? How can you spend money on a dress like that when so many people are suffering through a pandemic? What do you have to say about the BBC’s investigation into Martin Bashir?” At press time, music industry sources confirmed Elton John had just recorded a new version of “Candle In The Wind” as a tribute to the lost 43-inch LG smart TV.

LONDON—Cameras flashing as they barreled toward the screen upon which they believed they had spotted the Princess of Wales, several British paparazzi were overheard shouting,

“Diana’s there, on Netflix!” Tuesday before reflexively ramming a car into a television. “Princess Di! Princess Di! Over here!” said paparazzo Edmond Dowell, gunning it through a central London living room at 90 mph and demolishing the flat-screen display as he joined the dozens of photographers attempting to get a good shot of the late princess.

 

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I remember when The Onion was funny and sharply intelligent.

brutal

I was 6 when this happened, but I remember it with crystal clarity. The pap deserve every spare ounce of scorn going. This isn't a joke at Diana's expense.

👎

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Omg

Emotional reactions come from WEAK MINDS! Do you understand? I am right about this.

lmao

fuck the british tabloids + paparazzi

Classic

There’s a classic

StuartCNunn

It was Philip

so not funny!

The Onion said

t o o s o o n

Too soon.

JailTheEnglish

Oi, French Paparazzi if you don't mind.

I do hope the showrunners are unkind to the paparazzi.

.... I-

the Express may dox your staff for this. 🤣

charles_kinbote The Onion covering up the Queen’s crimes as always.

Oooooff too soon

holy fuck that was dark

This is the best tweet I have ever read.

Too soon?

John Mulaney is the British paparazzi?

Omg

Too soon.

It's been long enough everyone.

Oy 😂😂😂

i’m speechless

Holy fuck

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