My husband and I have been married for 12 years. We have two small kids, and we both work and are doing well financially. We’ve paid off all our student loans, we put down 20% on our mortgage when we purchased our home, we have a great income-to-debt ratio, we’ve already amassed a great 401 nest egg and, overall, we’re in a good, comfortable place.
A few years ago, they asked us to co-sign student loans for my husband’s younger brother, who was on his sixth year as an undergraduate at the time. That was my first inkling that things were not going well. I told my husband, “We’re not mixing family and finances.” I’m worried that as his parents get to an advanced age, they will come asking for money.
If you talk to your in-laws about their finances when you feel fearful and resentful about the role you believe you will have to play, it will probably go as well as you expect it to go: not very well. Those who say, “I don’t like confrontation!” may find it difficult to speak about an awkward situation without showing their displeasure or losing their cool. It’s only a confrontation if you believe it to be one.
The Financial Therapy Association takes a holistic approach to managing personal finances, including your history, anxieties, relationships and emotional life. Other organizations that may be worth contacting include the American Association of Daily Money Managers, the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys and the National Consumer Law Center.
Telling your husband that you shouldn’t feel obligated to support his parents because you don’t believe they have handled their lives responsibly will hurt him, damage your relationship with your wider family and, possibly, cause discord in your own marriage. Instead, empower your in-laws to make better decisions. Paying for a financial adviser today as a gift would be a good first step.
Read also: ‘He owed a lot of back taxes.’ My ex-husband forgot to split a $100,000 investment account — then he died. Can his estate come after me for the money?
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Get huge life insurance policies on both of them and then murder them so that you can make money off them instead of spending it on them. Your husband will thank you later, trust me
I would sell them to a chinese sweatshop
You don't put eater in a bucket that has a hole I it. Never give financially irresponsible people more money.
Our culture wants you to support the homeless, build a wall around your financial future