"Financial institution here. Our entire operating budget is covered by the overdraft fees we collect.""You are always better off at a credit union. They don't have shareholders , so they aren't incentivized to screw you out of your money like banks are.""Most movie theater employees don't care that you are sneaking in food, as long as you aren't obvious about it. Soda or candy in your pocket or bag? No problem.
If you have something negative to say about us and you say it in front of your kids, your kids will tell us. If you’re pregnant and want to wait until you're further along, don’t leave crap out on the counters or tell your kids because, you guessed it, we know.""One of my funniest secrets as a teacher is using a 'magic word' that makes all my students immediately stop making noise and pay attention to me.