Ferguson was fascinated with what parents did to shape his talented students. So he and co-author Tatsha Robertson comprehensively studied how different parenting styles shape children's success. Test subjects included the youngest statewide elected official in the country and the mother of the CEOs of YouTube and the genetics company 23andMe.Eight parental roles that Ferguson says make up the formula for master parenting.
This isn't the same as being a helicopter parent, who Ferguson says "are so involved in their children's lives they don't create space for them to develop independent relationships, learn how to negotiate for themselves, or identify their own interests." My wife and I started playing this role when we encountered a teacher that wasn't giving our daughter a fair shake.
This is classic role-modeling. Parents who do this well are clear about which values are important to them and work hard to pass those values on to their children, who then aspire to emulate them. My wife and I try to live our core values each day — but that doesn't mean it comes easy, or that we always succeed.Ivan Marjanovic/Shutterstock
Reassuringly, the Harvard researcher said that the most important quality for parents to exhibit as they wear these different hats is simply the determination to be a great parent. He calls this motivation "the burn," and says it often comes out of things in the parents' histories:
Not the time. Give us a rest.
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